Blame PINTEREST

Lately I have had a bad case of the 'I WANT's!  I will blame pinterest for this (don't worry I still love pinning).  There are so many fabulous homes, beautiful people, handy gadgets and just plain awesome stuff that I can't help but want it.  I feel like it is making me into this horrible selfish person that only thinks about herself and what she wants from others.  Was I always like this?  Okay, maybe I was and I am just finally realizing it (hopefully this is where Ian comments 'no you are so selfless honey')?

Two years ago I had my first child.  Prior to that I knew nothing (minus our 2 yrs of marriage) of sacrificing for others.  Since my first daughter was born I have HAD to sacrifice everything.  My job, body, sleep, time, sanity.  There is never any time for me so it has forced me into acting selfLESS.  Now with 2 daughters (aka - more demands on my time) I feel about to explode with selfISHness.  I want everything for me, ANYTHING for me, and I feel horrible thinking that way.  I have been so demanding... expecting more than I should be.

I am VERY grateful for what I have.  We are far better off than I expected to be in our first 5 years of marriage (thank goodness for not having to scrape by while getting through school - benefits to marrying at an older age I guess). AND I feel truly blessed to have 2 beautiful, healthy daughters.  Don't ever think I'm not grateful for them.

I just want to let you all know that I am not really selfish.  I just talk selfish because that is all I have right now... talk.  So I pin away my days wishing and dreaming that I have more than I do because 98% of my time, effort and talents are dedicated to my husband and young daughters.

Can I just have 24 hours away without cleaning, cooking, tantrums and nursing?  Perhaps after Christmas when I plan to wean my baby.

What would I do with 24 whole hours to myself?  That will be a post for tomorrow perhaps!

I'm grateful for

a safe place to live with almost zero natural disasters

upcoming spring, summer and fall

my hilarious, sensitive and tender hearted baby girl Hailey

my handsome, reliable and hard working husband

another baby girl on the way... who is either dancing inside me or having seizures (hopefully the first)

a wonderful home

family, those close and far

Skype that lets me see my family, near and far

a healthy body

and much, much more!

Ahhhhh, We got in!!!!!

Just got the call this morning.... we have a spot in the big ol' craft fair in November! Chesley (my co-hort) and I are super pumped for our first big business debut! It hasn't yet sunk in of how much work we have to complete in the next month and a half (an 83 item order for Christal's store as well as probably the same amount for the fair). Yikes! We can do it though and are thilled about how everything has just come together with this new business. We have a 10x10 foot booth in a PRIME location on the busiest aisle of the route... not to mention a corner booth! I am going crazy with excitement and am really wishing I had a garage or basement to do all this work in. I will find a way though... and may take you up, Lara, on your garage use offer.

So keep your calendars open folks (if you can make it all the way to Lloydminster) for November 14-16th. We will also need help managing the booth as I am quite sure we won't both survive there the entire time by ourselves. I am still not sure what to do about the Sunday part of it all but if we sell out of everything before Sunday then we just close the booth down.

I am so thankful to my Father in heaven for providing a way for this all to be possible. For giving me something to keep me busy as I still wait to teach, especially something that is so fun!

These high and lows of life are crazy and I am thankful for the love and support of you all. Sometimes it is hard not to feel alone when you are surrounded by people.